Thursday, October 31, 2013

So much Awesome. REDUPNY Giveaway!

http://the-pinkphoenix.com/?p=220

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Enter to win a chance at some awesome books by awesome people!

Saturday, August 17, 2013

Balcony Gardening experiment round 2

So this year I tried growing more veggies.  I gre Pattypan squash (fail) Cukes (meh) carrots (good!) Daikon (really good) beans (good) tomatoes (good, but took a long time, next time starting earlier and using different genome seed) and other plants; Nasturtiums, purslane, basil, garlic (not so good) Lettuce (great!) Arugula (great) marigolds (Prolific and lovely) New Guinea Impatiens (good but need too much water) and a variety of succulents and air plants (which did so well I now have three jade plants instead of one!)

Next year I think I am going to loose the squash, begonia and the cukes.  In theory they are great plants but the watering needs are too much for this not able to haul water cripple!

I did learn beans and marigolds do REALLY well together.  Chard is pretty and very edible (and takes a lot less soil and water than I was giving them.  Daikon works well but does require water every day... and basil and leaf lettuces are so easy I should grow them year round.

So year 2 season is coming to a close and soon it will be time to plant some mums on the porch and compost the plants after I gather some seeds.

Year three I am hoping lavender, mint, parsley, and oregano to take the place of the squash, cukes, and begonias.

Thursday, May 02, 2013

May Update- Sex, Sexuality and Consent.

There have been a lot of things on my mind lately.  I have not had time to blog having been sucked into working two jobs, dealing with ongoing health problems, and trying to keep two sickly animals alive.

These last few months found me trying to grow my own food, attempting to spring clean and purge myself of unused, unwanted crap in my house the very last thing I was want to do was sit down and read the news.

So last night when I found myself again up with my arthritis and my heart hammering and unable to breath right I decided to check up with my favorite pirate news group and talk to some people who take scouring the interwebs for news and stories as if it is their job.

Three things were immediately brought up that made me realize WHY I don't visit more often.  Somehow we ended up talking about sex (surprise!)  It was brought to light that many of us on the forum considered ourselves bisexual.  Suddenly a gay man interrupts to say "No disrespect but how is someone bisexual? Does it mean you will have sex with anyone?"  I honestly tried to keep it light but the jabs were continued with "So no one is safe from a bisexual! at least with my straight guy friends I know there is no chance of being raped!" the final straw was when it was stated that Bisexuals were really just closet "polygamist"

Trying to be the bigger person I left but was fuming.  To some people I am considered this wanton sex fiend who will sleep with anyone who has genitalia.  Because I am bisexual I must wander around in a state of constant lust ready to spring on unsuspecting people at any time.  Which ironically made me think about Danny Brown being sexually assaulted on stage at a show in Minnesota.

So because he is a man who has explicit sexual lyrics its a shrug-gable offense that a woman felt she could come onstage rip off his pants and put her mouth on his genitals?  Maybe he is bisexual and just gave off implied consent?

Last time I went to the orchestra or the opera you expressed pleasure at someone's performance by applause or buying merchandise not by ripping the pants off Yo Yo Ma and putting his penis in your mouth. 

We have this seriously fucked up view of consent.  I was talking to a friend in the porn industry who told me even the most accepting and open people seem to not grasp the idea of consent   "If I tell someone I am a porn actress they IMMEDIATELY become too familiar, thinking that they can touch me, slap my ass, or even try to kiss me.  Because I have sex onscreen and am openly bisexual it means that it is automatic consent for anyone to do what they want, like its not my body anymore."

It goes past the point of making me angry, it just makes me feel embarrassed for our generation.  What are we teaching the next generation about sexuality and consent?  What happened to "No means No?"

I am not buying into the Bullsh*t that people get "carrried away" or get "mixed signals" or "are asking for it".

Telling me "well honestly what did you expect" when someone is verbally or sexually assaulted because of who they are, their sexuality, race, gender, appearance, or even their job boggles my mind. Unless I tell you to put your hands on me, then don't touch me.  It really is that simple.

I have trouble with consent even at my job as a chef.  Everyday I find people who are too familiar. I am constantly having to enforce my own personal space, tell people to please not touch me.  The other day a person who I served food to for over a year came up and started rubbing my shoulders.  I immediately said "Don't do that" to which they responded "Put humans all need physical contact" as if that made it OK to touch me and not ask for my consent.

The fact is if you didn't ask, and I didn't say it was OK its not.  It really is that simple.

So if the above is true it should not matter WHAT my sexual preference is,or whom I find attractive nor what my job is. I will never touch someone without consent. 

So here is the take away you can be any gender, any sexual preference and not be in danger of  losing control of your wildfire libido and sexually assaulting them if you can grasp the idea of consent.  Not Implied, not inferred but have an actual 10 second discussion about consent.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Numerology and Deoderant

I can smell my spray deoderant BREWING away in the kitchen, smell good! I hope it works a well as the last stuff I used.  I WILL NOT be the stinky lady who always smells like BO.  WILL.  NOT.

I like that it is in a spray so I can spray under the boobage and muffin top.

I don't want to use commercial deo anymore because it has artificual smells, propylene glycol, and other stuff that is about a 1/2 molecule away from being a carcinogen.

Slowly I have been trying to get us AWAY from commercial crap and toward using sustainable, eco friendly toiletries and sundries.

My make your own detergent was an epic fail.  But I hope to try again, and I need to invest in some wool dryer balls, and natural fabric softener.

I like that dryer sheets seem to repel dog hair, but I hate the waste.  I have reused them to wash the shower and toilet (cuts thru soap scum!) but saving them feels like hoarding!

We use almost ONLY organic stuff on the dog, and he is softer, has less sores, smells better and even eats better.

So I read my numerology report today I am a 9:

9 Life Path number

If you have a 9 Life Path, you are perhaps the most challenged of all numbers in the relationship department. You are secretive and you keep your distance. Figuratively speaking, you don't like to show yourself naked, not just because it makes you feel vulnerable, which it does, but also because you see it as lacking class and sophistication. You have an aristocratic streak and value your sense of separation. You can be a great and loyal friend, but you don't expose your deeper fears or dreams even to those closest to you. For this reason, you enter a relationship the way someone who can't swim enters the pool; slowly and ready to back away at any time.

Its actually kind of scary how accurate that is!

I wish I knew Kayne Michael's and Dodger's numbers.

I still need to hop into the shower and get to the library...unless I just listen to my book on tape and draw/color instead.  Kinda feel lazy today.  Leftovers and some squats and that's it.  Library can happen tomorrow.

Friday, January 25, 2013

Sugar, aw honey, honey....

UGH.  It is true.  I am like a heroin addict when it comes to sugar.  I don't boil it in a spoon and inject it, but when I have a bad day, or am in pain, or am just moody all I can think about is a giant sundae, or cookie, or organic milk chocolate.....

It makes me drool just thinking about it. 

I have been good with trying to avoid sugar and foods that are high on the glycemic index

But yesterday not one but two dirty old men came into my work making lewd comments about "Serving my breasts"  or "Your breasts are so juicy!"  or "Do I get two breasts?  they come in pairs!" 

People I did NOT know, people who stood there being lewd and annoying causing me at one point to say "Oh thats hilarious, tell my husband there what you said!"  Pointing to my very tall, very large friend Mark from produce who is built like a mountain.  He walked over, put his arm around my waist and says in his deep gravely voice "Everything ok hunny?"  The older man gaped like a fish and skittered away.   But I was still shaking and seriously uncomfortable.

Mark said before he is my go to security guy because he thinks of me like a little sister and his girlfriend loves me.  I am normally tougher than that, but it was the straw that broke the camels back.  So my boss bought me a cookie, and a small ice cream cone.

I should say about my job people are normally VERY kind.  But there are just every one in a hundred who make you feel anxious, uncomfortable, and like you want to crawl into a dark hole and hide.

Predators.

After my bad day at work I had the stupid idea to run to sprawlmart and pick up long underwear for myself and Chris (especially myself because I am FREEZING in my work warehouse!)  they are doing construction and I could not find anything.  It took me almost 40 minutes to find leggings and long underwear.  And once I found leggings they had only size "gigantic" or "infant"  I was so annoyed I left with too big leggings that I will probably use as pajamas and long underwear that i prayed would fit Chris.

Kayne Michael still has an open sore on his foot.  I need to go to a drug store and get Vet Wrap and gauze.  until it is healed and stops draining it needs to be cleaned and covered and I don't want him to have to wear a lamp shade on his head.  The vet said if it is still "weeping" after a few days we will have to insert a drain or "wick"  its basically sterile gauze that is partially packd into the wound and the tail is left out, then the entire thing is covered and left for a day.  The gauze absorbs any fluid or puss and then you pull it out.  I have seen it done, and assisted in doing several drains on large and small animals, but Chris is virtually useless when it comes to even cleaning a wound much less shaving a struggling animal and holding him while I incise and pack a wound.   I may just take him to the clinic and get him doped on Valium before hand (vet prescribed)

Luckily our vet knows my history with working at Clinics and has no problem with letting ME give Kayne intramuscular, subcutaneous, and IV shots as long as  he watches.  Kayne has veins like a horse and if I can get a vein on a kitten who is barely three weeks old, he is like throwing a bowling ball down a hallway.  Even the vets from Cornell said "If you are comfortable with it we will just let you start his IV"

The skills you learn working with a large dog who has serious anxiety and stranger aggression.

I swear my house looks like a minature pharmacy with all the butterfly IVs, needles, syringes, medications, IV bags, tubing, gauze, ointments, tapes, vet wrap...

And with Chris being accident prone the only thing that I DON'T have is sutures.  Well at least if the apocalypse comes I will be able to treat wounds!

I kinda want to learn phlebotomy just so I can learn to draw my own blood blindfolded.  Everyone seems to have trouble with it, but my sister in law could draw blood from a mouse.  She is REALLY GOOD. 

I am talking with my vet friend who is also a naturopath and told him I had tried drawing poultice on Kayne's foot.  I said it looked better today, we agree that we will use the small wick and ichthammol and calendula pack for a few more days.

I don't want to put him on antibiotics because Bulldogs are already so low in immune response I don't want to lower it anymore.

Currently Kayne is sleeping with his stuffed monkey with his foot covered in a gauze and a clean sock.

Poor baby!

Oh a note on Dodger.  Dodger Oliver "De Leon" Manlove is a cat bully.

BUT I have been giving all the cats "GoOD Cat!" and Bachs Rescue Rememdy.  I put it on their noses and dilluted it and sprayed it on their bedding and food.

Dodger last night actually was trying to cuddle with Ani.  Ani Louise was NOT HAVING THAT.  and smacked him in the face.

Dodger ran over to me and slumped down hiding his face in my chest.  I think he really wants to play and cuddle and the girls are just too old for that.

He even tries to get the dog to play with him.

Chris and I are torn.  We think that having another cat would be a bad idea, but also think Dodger really needs someone to play with besides myself and Chris.  We may offer to temporarily keep one of the girl Siamese from downstairs so Dodger has a playmate... We are still thinking about it, not wanting to go thru having the girls pee on our bed in anger.

Suggestions?

KJ