Things I am entering. A giveaway

China Glaze Vintage Vixen set in Cat´s Meow
One lucky winner gets this set of six polishes. It includes:
Goin' My Way?
Emerald Fitzgerald
Riverter Rouge
Classic Camel
Midnight Mission
First Class Ticket

So the lovely lady at All You Desire (www.all-you-desire.com) was reccomended to me by a fellow polish affianado who knows how much I love looking at comparisons between nail polish colors.

Whay do you mean? you are saying? Let me explain. I hate nothing more that to go out, buy a 10 dollar bottle of ail polish, come home and find out it is a chipping, flakey mess, or worse that I love it and have just bought the last bottle.''It is enough to make you hair turn white, and grind your teeth flat.

So in comes All-that-you-desire.com with a great eye for immediately picking out similarities between polishes and showing the to us so that we can decide for ourselves whether the more expensive one is earth the price r replace a discontinued much beloved color.

We all fall down

So once again my great big horse of a dog managed to physically injure one of us in the house with his overly enthusiastic bull headed self.

Whilst walking to the front porch to let the do out for our afternoon break, my dog Kayne suddenly lurched in front of me.

Thus knocking me sideways causing me to step partially out of my shoe, become tangled in a potted plant, step sideways onto my right ankle and then fall to my knees.

The same ankle I have broken three times.

The same ankle I have sprained so many times I have lost track.

The same ankle that is so screwed up and badly patched that after one x-ray y my doctor he took back my handicap tag application and wrote "disfigured right foot" under reasons for needed a handicapped tag.

So back to the front porch.

I am on my knees when the pain of my right foot hits me and I think I a about to throw up. I pull it out in front of me and look at it and immediately know that if its not broken its badly sprained.

Trying to move my toes and I have to suck in breath. I feel tears begin to sting my eyes and suddenly think. Didn't I used to compete with broken limbs?

Pulling out my cell phone I call my fiance Chris. I get his voice mail and I sit there for a moment wondering what to say.

It has come to the worst case scenario. I am trapped, on my front porch, with my anti-social dog. I have fallen, and I can't get up.

Hanging up the phone, I throw my flip flops at the dog who is sleeping peacefully in the sun.

Then I remember, my laptop is plugged in just inside the door.

Reaching inside the screen I drag my laptop to me by the cord and boot it up. using my arms and left leg I lever myself into a patio chair and set myself up with my lap top and set to distract myself until Chris comes home.

He calls and I pick up my cell phone, trying to hold back tears.

"What happened?" he says sounding annoyed.

"The dog tripped me and I fell down and hurt my foot and can't put weight on it, I am stuck on the front porch, but I have my phone and my laptop." I say, voice wavering with tears.

I hear him start to swear and rant as he puts the phone down.

Hearing myself begin to apologize for calling saying I didn't know what to do because it hurts really bad. My inner voice is whacking my head with a newspaper screaming "Don't apologize! Why are you apologizing?!"

"What do you want me to do about it?!" he yells.

I am shocked. I am no longer upset. I am deeply, passionately, pissed off.

"Thanks you for calling, it was so kind of you to be concerned." I say and hang up.

Seated, unable to get up and throw things, unable to yell because I am outside in front of the neighbors, unwilling to cry,ankle throbbing in time with the beat of my heart I try to pull myself together into a state of calm resepctability.

I take some deep breathes and try to focus on anything besides the deep, burning, throb that is my right foot.

I try to think schematics of my house. Where is the nearest cane? Chris has a skateboard in the living room maybe I could sit on it and scoot to the kitchen for an icepack? did I need an x-ray? did we have ace bandages? How was I going to make us dinner? Did the dog need to go potty? hell we lived on a 2nd floor walk up! How was the laundry going to get done?

Suddenly the reality of what just happened fell on me like a bucket of water and I was in a panic. There was three cats, a dog, and a redheaded human male to take care of and I couldn't just trust that he would pick up and take over the things that I did because I couldn't walk.

Just as I was trying to psyche myself up to try to crawl inside and find my old foot brace or an ace bandage the dog did his "ZOMG! Daddy came home and he brought the car!" song and dance.

Chris came upstairs, came out to the patio, looked at my foot and said "Wow, you aren't going to be able to walk on that for a few days, let me get ice and find an ace bandage."

So I lifted the death threat I had put on him. He actually helped me get inside, set me up comfy with an icepack and a book. Even went and bought me an iced coffee.

It wasn't until 3 hours later that he started complaining about being hungry and asking if we really were going to eat Peanut butter and jelly, cereal, and ramen for the next few days because that was all he could make.

To be fair he did set everything out for me and got me a chair to sit in while I cooked. And he does help me get things so I don't have to move around a lot, and he makes me ice my ankle.

Still, I see the wheels turning in his head on how to get me to the laundromat with the 4 baskets of laundry and not need to stay himself.

So yes, I have probably further screwed up my foot. Possibly done irreparable damage but in this comically hard luck life of mine, nothing comes as a surprise to me anymore.

I hope by the end of next week that my foot is significantly better, I'm not holding my breath.

In the end, everyone falls at one point or another, it take a strong will, and the support of someone who care to lever ourselves back up to soldier on.

The Makings for a home manicure

My fiance met me and loved that I loved kitties. Loved that I could play acoustic guitar. Loved that I had more compact discs and vinyl records than him (which is saying a lot) What he didn't love so much is my habit of biting my nails.

Yes I admit it, I was a nail biter. beyond just biting, I would literally bite my nails until they were so ragged and destroyed I needed band aids.

So after a few failed attempt with acrylic nails, which I literally felt like I was wearing something that needed to be taken off because it felt so weird on my fingers.

My lovely fiance came home with a bunch of nail files, a bottle of Sally Hanson "Hard as nails" and a promise that for every week I didn't chew my nails I could get a new polish.

How he is regretting his offer now.

I never take into a bet halfheartedly.

Nails are actually made out of a protein called Keratin. Nails grow fastest during the summer (just like our hair, because its the same stuff) and the rate of growth is largely dependent of factors such as diet, exercise, heredity, and gender.

In addition to diet many have resorted to supplementation to thicken their nails. There are several dermatologists and nutritionists who say taking 2.5 mg of Biotin will help to grow out nails that are thin, brittle, or peeling.

There is also the long standing advice of housewives everywhere:

Wear plastic gloves to do dishes.

Always moisturize after you wash your hands.

Use a really thick moisturizer at night.

Avoid constant wetting and drying of your nails.

With the advent of hand sanitizer this seems easier than ever, but be wary not to overdo with the alcohol based hand sanitizers. Alcohol draws water from the skin and can make hands and nails dry.

So after learning about the anatomy of a nail I went online and into the drugstores to find the most cost effective products to give me an awesome manicure.

Here is what I bought for my arsenal:

Hydrogen Peroxide, Baking Soda, and Denture cleaner ($6)- Yes, you have read the previous correctly. I have the previous in my collection of manicure supplies. If you mix a TSP baking soda with just a drop of peroxide to make a paste and apply to nails between dark polishes it will keep them from yellowing. Additionally once every 4 weeks I give myself a soak bare nails in denture cleaner. You can get this cheap at the dollar store. This whitens my tips and removes any trace of yellowing or discoloration from my nails. I have to thank my friend Garnet for this tip!

Cotton pads($1)- Dedicated only to your nail polish stash. You will use up these little babies like they are going extinct.

Polish remover($2-$5)- I have heard the arguments "No use non acetone on natural nails" "No acetone is fine!" It is a personal preference. Personally I would like to not spend 20 minutes removing polish from my nails. Acetone polish remover takes it off like no bodies business. However, I have heard from many beauty guru's that acetone is very drying. But every Non- acetone polish remove I have used has sucked! So until I find a non acetone polish remover that removes polish at a speed I am comfortable with I will be continuing to use Acetone based polish.


Orange sticks/Cuticle pusher ($2)- I have a rubber cuticle pusher as well as a few orange sticks and a metal under nail cleaner (what the pointy part of the orange stick is for) I have to use this routinely on my fiance and his ingrown toenails. The great part about metal is that after you are done you can sanitize it. Orange sticks are not as sanitary, but are entirely disposable and cheap. I recommend having at least a few.


Creative Nail Design Stickey Base Coat($6)- A base coat that came highly recommended. I'd tried Orly Ridge Filler, Sally Hansen Ridge Filler, and Orly Orlon base coat and Orly Bonder. All of them began to chip and peel by day two no matter how carefully I applied my nail polish. The only one that I managed to get more than 5 day wear from was Creative Nail Design Stickey Basecoat. I think you have to do your own testing and find out what works for your nails, but this seems to work for several.

Several Nail Polish colors! My favorite brands are Sinful Colors and China Glaze. China Glaze I have only found at Sally Beauty Supply. I do have some OPI colors, some Sally Hansen,and Some Scherer Petites.

Sally Hansen French Tip Pen($5)- This has made doing a french manicure SO MUCH easier for me. I have shaky hands, don't want to mess with tiny strips on my nails, and want to be able to do touch ups with no trouble. This pen makes it so easy. Available in wide tip or fine tip its easy to find one to suite your needs and the look on the nails is natural.

INM: Out the door fast dry top coat ($5)- So everyone I know says "I LOVE Seche Vite top coat! oh its so great!" I was able to try it for free from a friends bottle. I'm sorry but the shrinkage, the smell? and the fact that it dries up so fast in the bottle! for almost 10 bucks for a bottle I was not colored impressed. Enter INM "Out the door fast dry top coat" from Sally Beauty Supply. This 5 dollar a bottle, thinner liquid, super fast drying, and not NEARLY as terrible smelling Top coat is great at drying my polish, and maintaining my manicure.

The best part is it isn't too thick that I can't reapply a coat every other day to freshen my mani.

Emery boards ($2)- Basic must. Have a few of these in a grit for natural nails. And always keep one in your backpack or purse. Something that drives me crazy now is when I break a tip or have an edge and no emery board in site.


Crystal/stone file($3-$12)- You can find these at any Beauty supply stores. I was stupid enough to buy one at the Mall of America for 20 bucks. Its a stone nail file that files the nail and you can use it to seal the nail edge as well as buff off dried cuticles.


Thick hand cream and/or cuticle oil($3-$12)- I happened to find Barielle cuticle oil on clearance at a Big Box store for 3 dollars. So I use it every night along with my super thick old lady cream that I haven't been able to find recently and am using sparingly. But there are several great thick hand creams that either have oils already added in, or are specifically for hands. Find one that works for your skin type and use it religiously.

Its an arsenal right? But once you find your go to products and arrange them in a neat little bag, you find out that it really isn't that many things.

So looking at the list is "seems" like a lot of stuff. In reality it fits into a small plastic bin. Once you have your Mainstays like basecoat, topcoat, polish remover, emery boards and other tools, you will learn how best to organize it and the only thing that you will continually need to find space for is nail polish colors.

Consider this, setting up your own at home Manicure set will cost nearly $35-$60 to set up and that doesn't include Nail Color. But going to a salon and having your nails done 52 times a year for $20 not including tip would be $1040 a year. Even just having a once a month Manicure for $20 would still land you $240 a year.

Where as you add in toe separators and a friend and you have a Friday night pampering session that leaves you beautiful and saves you money.

So go forth into the Beauty supply stores, drugstores, and dollar stores of the world and gather your arsenal and prepare to get beautiful.

The Mills Rose Garden is one of ten AARS accredited public display rose gardens in New York State.

I have always driven by The Syracuse Thornden Park Rose Garden and said "I have got to get there and see the roses"

For 8 years living in Syracuse I have been there twice.

Once for the tackiest wedding ever. And once to break up with a boyfriend.

Ah sweet, sweet memories.

I needed to get back to the garden and make it less of memory seeped in evil.

The one great thing about this greenhouse weather we have been having is apparently it has made for absolutely robust and stunning roses.

So I grabbed my handy Panasonic, my Keen sandals, and Deep Woods OFF! and went to smell the roses.

A small bit of trivia I learned boning up on the M. Mills Rose Garden. The Mills Rose Garden is one of ten AARS accredited public display rose gardens in New York State.

The Syracuse Rose Society is in charge of maintenance of the roses in the M. Mills Rose Garden and it is the third Syracuse Rose Society garden founded in Syracuse by the society which was started in 1916.

This garden is located in Thornden Park, Syracuse, NY. A park that is located on land donated to the city by M Mills, a founding member of the Syracuse Rose Society and Rose and Garden enthusiast.

Thornden Park still boast the M Mills Rose Garden and the Syracuse Rose society continues to perform maintenance every Wednesday and some Saturdays throughout the late spring through early November.

I have this vision of the Syracuse Rose Society being a select group of people converging on the rose garden in the early morning when the park is still misty armed with pruning shears and hand misters. Wearing straw hats and khaki shirts silently moving across the garden like devoted monks at prayer. I am informed by a member of the SRS whom is 25 years of age with a laugh that my visions are fanciful and couldn't be farther from reality.

In truth they are always happy to have a hand weeding, pruning, spraying, and hand picking dead heads off flowers. Often there is music, laughing, and refreshments in the gazebo that sits in the center of the garden.

With this new insight shattering my ninja-assassin secret society of rose enthusiasts I still find the enthusiasm to go sniff the local flora.

Upon entering the garden and visiting rows upon rows of riotous color, the careful dedication of his small group of volunteers shows.





Hundreds of people use the Rose garden During June through Early August for Weddings, Photo shoots, and parties. When others are not using it for these reasons you can still find people walking around simply enjoying the relaxing atmosphere of the blooms.



The sheer amount of colors is enough to keep you wandering around in circles for hours on end.



I found colors that I had to check the camera and take off my sunglasses because I wasn't sure I was seeing correctly.



Unusual shapes, colors, scents. Flowers that I couldn't confirm were roses except for the placard set at their feet.





And roses that reminded me of loved ones like my grandmother who used to tell me how she had once received a perfect blue rose and always remembered it as being so beautiful.



However the most interesting thing about the rose garden is not the roses themselves. It really isn't. It is the age of some of the bushes that are still blooming there.









Those are just some of the oldest placards that I took a picture of and not all of them.

I was thoroughly exhausted, sore, and had no power left in my camera by the time the light faded from the sky and I trooped back to my car to head home with my camera full of pictures and my nose full of heady perfume.


It occurs to me though the M Mills Rose Garden is more than a place in Syracuse with pretty flowers. Its more than a beautiful place to get married, more than a nice area to soften the blow of a breakup, more than a romantic spot to walk and hold hands.

It is a sacred beautiful space where anyone can come and still find something to be in awe of. A place where people with a common love for a very old flower still join together to keep it beautiful for our future generations.

So if you are near, don't wait for a special occasion to visit these pockets of beauty. Its our responsibility to enjoy them, share their beauty, and revel in their splendor.

Musicians road map.

So we consider the source. I am a music snob. Truly no holds barred, I will have heard some of the best singers, songwriters, conductors, composers, and true masters on stage, in churches, on street corners, in smokey bars,in hot basements, crowded community centers, dives, plazas, hotel rooms, tour buses, and my life is half done.

I love music and developed an ear early because I was lucky enough to have parents who loved and appreciated music, a knack for picking up instruments, and now a partner with my same ear for the sweetness.

Also pervert my sensibilities with a father who ran a kitchen in the most popular night club in Minnesota. A classically trained vocal performance mother with a poster of Rick James in her closet. And a Southern born and bred grandmother who would drag me to every orchestra concert she could, and also taught me every burlesque song she knew.

I was doomed to be the kid who played the ukelele at camp and had a collection of autographs of famous Old men like "John Ritter" and "Sir David Wilcocks" (who knew me by name and always sang one christmas songs to me and wrote it out to me on sheet music before he left to return to England saying "Keep music close")

Kool and the Gang, Prince, The Times, and Chaka Khan! I don't even remember who else. Combined with Susan Battle (The opera Worlds Naomi Campbell) Sarah Brightman (nicest woman in the world), Andrew Lloyd Weber, John Milfrod Rutter,and Sir David Wilcox.

These moments burn themselves into your memory and come back in waves hearing the familiar opening notes.

If you have been touched by it you know what I am talking about.

That feeling when you hear a musician, or performer start their set and the entire audience in gelled together into one cohesive heartbeat and one song glides seamlessly into another.

Everything around the audience and the musician disappears and you are led through a series of stories. Muscles in your arms and legs twitch involuntarily in beat to the rhythms, maybe tears come to your eyes or you have to fight not to sing along.

I personally hate it when you sing along. But I remember once at a Dead Prez rap concert. One of the most magical concerts I have ever been to. I was in the middle of the crowd dancing, singing along, and the lead artist stopped mid track and put the microphone out to the audience, and the audience spit the lyrics to the rap verbatim without skipping a beat. It was heart stopping how powerful it felt.

"Hell Yeah"

http://www.youtube.com/user/deadprezVEVO?ob=artistob#p/a/u/1/J27tRF1FvXs

I actually really love this group because of the social commentary and how much the group and grown up personally and professionally. I had the chance to meet them and talk about growing up, being vegan, drugs, inner city youth, and even cancer. A great bunch of guys don't let this video make you think they are a bunch of Street thugs. You couldn't be more wrong.

No one was violent, no one was angry. Everyone was there with a mutual appreciation for a great group of rappers and a desire to hear them perform.

The first memory I have of being absolutely mesmerized was when I saw Placido Domingo and Sarah Brightman sing Hosanna in Excelsis Deo. Part of the great music piece "Requiem" If you never get a chance to hear this piece....



It was during a rehearsal, so I was literally front seat, third row, holding my mom's purse. She and her friend were in the background chorus for the performance with the Minnesota Orchestra.

Imagine a little girl hearing this, sitting by herself in a huge theater.

Needless to say it was the when the drums came in and Placido and Sarah started to encourage the chamber choir to dance with them and the full orchestra came in that I was literally stunned and didn't know whether to stand and dance or continue to sit their with my mouth hanging open.

Since then I have heard many musicians. Some great, many not so great and many that I will carry in my memory forever.

Its a curse, once you hear music that is divine and you receive the gift of being able to sort the good from the bad it is a musician lovers game of mousetrap trying to find musicians these days with something new and wonderful to offer.

If you have not checked them out I have become a huge fan of Muse. Particularly this song.



Musically having your chops, not afraid to take chances, drawing you into their music, and they deliver on CD and in concert. Concerts, remember those? When we used to go to hear music? Not to watch a magic show, or a skateboard demo, just to sit or stand in the audience with your fellow music lover and revel in music.

So this is my small synapses to today. Albeit brief, my play list on my computer is almost 3G and we have over 2 MP3 players, 7 shoe boxes of digital recordings, 6 CD towers of original recordings, and 20 vinyl records worth of music in the house.

I for one am by no means done seeing what the world will put out for me to discover.

Canine Courtesy on the curb.

Walking in the heat of the city streets of Syracuse is pretty brutal in the months of June through August.

You can tell what season it is by looking around you and seeing the mass exodus of people whom move furniture out of their homes and onto their patios, porches, stoops, lawns, steps, driveways and sidewalks.

They sit and enjoy what breeze they can, watch the kids play, catch up on neighborhood gossip, and revel in being out of the house while they can.

I too enjoy this time of year. It is the time I take my dog for late evening walks. Armed with plastic bags, my cell phone, emergency money, and self defense device. I often take to the street with and without the hound to walk to the local coffee shop, pick up a book at the library, or just tool around and check out what is growing in my friends gardens.

When my canine companion is with me on my walks he routinely stops in one of three places and takes a masterfully large dump. I always come prepared and carry three plastic bags.

I pick up the poop, tie off the bag, and off we go.

He continues his walk on his leash, I carry his droppings, to be disposed of in my trash can or a dumpster.

Never does it occur to me to leave his crap on someone else's lawn.

Neither does it occur to me to take off his leash and let his run amok.

Would he listen to me? Yes. Would he come if I called him? Yes. Would I absolutely rely on that? Absolutely not.

So why is it that I am the minority?

Walking around my neighborhood it drives me insane to see piles of dog crap left everywhere. I don't mean here a crap there a crap, I mean everywhere a crap crap.

Walking in the park we passed twelve dogs who had taken massive dumps and their owners smiled, shrugged, and walked away from the steaming pile of poop.

My fiance and I just stared at each other. This is why when we go to the park, we have to mind our step, because other dog owners cannot be burdened to carry a plastic bag and pick up dog crap.

Which brings me to the next issue of canine courtesy that seems to be missing in Syracuse local dog scene. Leash laws. In parks, dogs must be on a leash. This is for your dogs protection, and mine.

Here is a situation. My dog is afraid of other dogs. We keep him away from other dogs. Your dog,who is not on a leash, runs up to my dog, who is on a leash, I have to grapple push, boot, and yell at your dog to go away and get back to you, you whom are standing there holding your leash mouth open gaping like a fish not helping me by grabbing your dog.

Thanks.

Don't count on your dog listening to you. Dogs are dogs. They are driven by instinct and it takes one second and one time chasing something across a busy street and not having a leash on and being hit by a car and suddenly hindsight is 20/20.

Your leash could be made from a shoelace if thats all it takes for your dog to remember to stay within a certain distance of you. But in a park where there are leash laws and rules about picking up after your dog. Everyone has the right to enjoy the park, and if you want to come out and play, follow the rules.

You want to leave your dog crap on the ground and run loose with your dog find somewhere where everyone is cool with it. until then watch out.

I see your dog taking a crap and you leaving it, you might wake up to a weeks worth of dog crap on your doorstep with a note saying "Dear inconsiderate citizen, I believe you forgot to clean this up when you walked your dog. I left you some plastic bags so next time you can clean up your dogs poop. We are watching you, next time you leave your droppings on our lawns and gardens you will find it on your doorstep in flames. Sincerely, Citizen Canines"

We are pissed, we are watching, we will your crap at your doorstep.

Coconut London Bars: Test Kitchen Success!

So people who know me know that I have been looking for an authentic version of my Nana's awesome "London Bars" since she lost her recipe moving into her retirement castle.

I have tested several "London Bar" recipes as well as several "Coconut Bar" recipes and while they were ok to terrible nothing came close.

After another EPIC FAIL last night with a recipe involving evaporated milk I went online seeking expert advice.

An online cook friend who happens to work in a baking test kitchen I told her about my Bar quandry. She suggested that we conference online and try to work out ingredients.

Together we came up with a recipe and this morning too excited to sleep I woke up and whipped out a batch.

They came out delicious!

Here is the recipe and I hope that you make some for yourself soon!



KJ's Coconut London Bars

Ingredients:

Crust:

1 c. flour
1/2 c. Brown sugar
1/2 c (stick) unsalted butter

Mix together to form crumbly texture and press into bottom of 8x10 pan
(note: I used 1 1/4 cup flour 3/4 cup brown sugar and the same amount of butter in a 9x13 glass pan with no problems)

Bake at 325 for 10 minutes or until golden brown

Center layer:
1 c. Brown sugar
2 eggs (don't whisk first!)
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
2 tsp flour
1/2 tsp Baking powder
dash salt
1 c. Fresh grated coconut/Frozen thawed fresh cocnut

Top:
1 c. Chopped pecans or walnuts

So while the crust is baking put together the ingredients for the middle in a bowl and mix together with a spatula, folding the ingredients together gently scraping down the sides as needed for about 2 minutes.

Pour mixture over crust when it is done and hot from the oven, and sprinkle with nuts.
Bake at 325 for 15-20 minutes, cool on wire rack. Can be drizzled with confectioners sugar icing if desired.

You make it, you eat it

As an independent foodie and child of a chef and grand daughter of one of the best home cooks in the midwest I'd like to think I know my way around food.

Growing up with a grandmother who knew good food and could tell list the ten top restaurants still running in Minnesota off the top of her head, while banging out homemade cookies in 12 varieties for the neighborhood I was spoiled for quality.

My nana and I still call each other and share recipes we see on television that we thin are ridiculous, or call to gossip about a restaurant poorly preparing a meal.

My nana and I are always going out for dinner at some restaurant famous for their food and giving it the once over.

Sadly, since I had taken her to Matt's Bar and had a Jucy Lucy Burger we hadn't had any restaurants or chef's that we both really wanted to seek out.

So on a whim I told her we should watch some Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations. We both enjoy his show and have been to his restaurant in NYC Layla's (Bes Fries EVER.)

My nana even bought me a copy of Kitchen Confidential for my birthday.

Watching his show always whet our appetite to go out and try new recipes and restaurants again.

That was when we saw Chef Edward Tuson.

I have always been a big local eater and our backyard growing up was a virtual forest of vegetables and edible flowers.

The first time I went to camp at nine years old and tasted iceberg lettuce with bottled dressing I remembered asking my camp counselor what it was.

Living in an apartment before I found the farmers market I literally befriended the elderly citizens of my neighborhood and helped them out with small chores just for the opportunity to take a few things from their garden.

Edward Tuson was a chef in Vancover, British Columbia who understood that devotion to food.

He raised his own meat, grew his own veggies, smoked his own fish, (that he caught himself or bought from local fisherman), and harvested local flora, to prepare and serve for 12 years at the Sooke Island Restaurant.

And as Anthony Bourdain said of his food both eating and looking at it, was magical.

Edward Tuson said that everything that he used could be found within 20 miles of Sooke and it consisted of 75-85% of what they served.

Can you look in your kitchen cupboard and find 10 things that were produced in the same state you live in?

Now Edward Tuson is running a smaller restaurant with much simpler but still local and delicious fare in an establishment called "The EdGe" Still finding it packed to the gills and still using his garden, local flora and fauna his reason for leaving is simple.

"I want to cook food that I would eat."

A chef after my own heart.

Visit Edward Tuson at "The EdGe" on Sooke Street, British Columbia, Canada

KJ Callaway

Dinner on the cheap

So we have no money. But being that I stock up on weird things like pasta sauces, dried herbs, frozen fish, rice, cake mixes that go on clearance for 50 cents. We may whine about not being able to go out an have someone else do the cooking for us, but the truth is, not only are we eating well, but we are eating cheap.

Having a chef for a dad and having gotten to know him and having the worlds greatest home cooker for a Nana raise me gave me a minimalist sense of putting things together. I grew a palette for food that had a taste for Flavors that excited, soothes, sent electricity down your spine or lit up your mouth with a simple medley of flavors that went well together and I also learned to create some of my own culinary pieces that border lined on religious experience.

So eve though we are broke and scraping by I keep my spice shelf stocked by trade. I know which stores to buy fish for cheap.

I go to the farmers market and load up on the fresh fruits and veggies for the week, and know I am going to spend the day cleaning, processing and readying them for the week to make dinner faster.

But its worth it to be able to feed 2 adults for about 200 dollars a month.

We don't drink, I don't buy soda, we rarely eat meat, and when we do its from the farmers market and is usually cheaper than the store.

I trade bakery products for Venison and Duck.

And we eat WELL.

Tonight for dinner we had Agave-Spicy mustard reduction covered Salmon with Panko breading.

* 4 (4 ounce) fillets salmon
* 3 tablespoons prepared Dijon-style mustard
* 1 tablespoon raw agave nectar/1 tsp honey
* salt and pepper to taste
* 1/4 cup Panko dry bread crumbs
* 1/4 cup butter, melted

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C). Line a shallow baking pan with aluminum foil.
2. Place salmon skin-side down on foil. Spread a thin layer of agave/mustard on the top of each fillet, and season with salt and pepper. Top with bread crumbs, then drizzle with melted butter.
3. Bake in a preheated oven for 15 minutes, or until salmon flakes easily with a fork.



Chris couldn't believe it was low Glycemic index and Loved the taste. He sill gives brown rice the big thumbs down. I even added butter bacon drippings and salt.

It was TASTY. He said It was chewey and crunchy. It was NOT crunchy. I tasted it the whole time I was coking it.

He is just never going to be a fan of anything but mooshy smooshy white rice.

Up next I want to get a grip on the 5 mother saues. I did tomato. So think Holandaise is going to be next.

Happy Cooking

KJ

Dad's impromtu eulogy

So I had to get up in front of a room full of baptists and give a short impromptu Eulogy. (one of three)

I was a LITTLE ticked off that 1. They were having a baptist funeral and he was REALLY not even christian. He was very OK in being a sort of Pantheist.

2. A guy who had never met that man spent almost the entire funeral preaching at the people in the chairs who were there trying to mourn.

3. The people who came and spoke the longest about him BARELY KNEW THE MAN, because most of his construction worker, and chef friends WEREN'T INVITED.

4. OPEN CASKET. Cancer emaciated guy on display? so wrong.

So my eulogy was a little I dunno. I Aunt J helped me piece it back together. She and my cousins loved it.

*Shrug* They didn't run me out of town and they told me I had to come and visit, so it must have seemed ok.

SO here is the eulogy:

Wow, I am up here with nothing prepared. I'm JC's daughter Joy Elizabth. I told myself I wasn't going to cry. I am finding that hard to do.

Not for the reason you think though. This whole thing just does not feel right. My dad and I, we didn't have that father daughter thing. I remember for so long being angry about that. Thinking I was missing out on something.

I remember walking into the restaurant “The Egg and I” in Minnesota. I was 12 year old. I stood toe to toe with my father. He looked so happy to see me. Until I started to rip him a new one. Asking him why he couldn't be a normal dad, why he wasn't a real father, telling him he had no right to call himself my father.

And instead of getting mad, instead of turing away, or coming up with exscuses, or promises, he put his hands on my shoulders and said “You're right, I have no right to try to be your father, but maybe I can be a friend”

And whenever I needed someone to talk to day or night, I could call him and he would talk to me, listen to me, and tell me his advice.

I called him when I was failing home-ec in junior high because I couldn't bake. And he walked me through it step by step. I can bake now by the way.

I called him the night I graduated high school, made the joke that I was going to skip college to become a race car driver and was rewarded with a 30 minute lecture of the importance of an education, by the man who didn't graduate high school.

I called him when I got my black belt.

I called him when I moved away from home to another state.

I called him when I got engaged.

Then my fiance started to call him. We called him and would split our time and wrestling the phone away from Chris was like a poodle with a chew toy.

I called him when we got our dog.

I called him when I got sick.

I called him when I lost my job.

I called him when I got sicker.

And always, every Saturday on Chris' cell phone or mine up until the last 3 months of his life he would call us if he hadn't heard from us in a week.

We talked about religion. I talked to my dad, and sent my dad books and I know my dad was right with his god long before anyone else put any label on him. My father never needed a label or a chapel to be a good man.

We talked about the base of a person, how it has no label, but there is a spark, and how a persons actions feed or dim that spark.

My dad had this spark about him that burned small but bright and hot. Anyone who was close to him felt that pull to be near him and listen to him, talk to him, and ask his advice.

Even though he never led on the wealth and breadth of how much he knew if you were near him and asked the right questions to the right friends of his, even ex wives and girlfriends, they would tell you stories about him that would blow your mind.

So while it saddens me to see so few people here today, it doesn't surprise me. Dad was like a VIP club you had to have something to get in, but once you were in, you were in for good.

So his death will probably come to a shock to a lot of people I have to tell, who would have come to pay their last respects.

This doesn't feel right.

People are trying really hard to not mention Cancer, but I am going to say it. Cancer is a killer, it is vicious and leaves people heartbroken.

I know everyday will get easier. My brother died of cancer, and it still hurts, but not as much.

But someday I will wake up and not want to cry.

Today, however. The world is a dimmer place without my father in it.

Rest in peace dad, you never needed anyone to tell you how to live or die a man.

Well Pickles.

I made Bread and butter pickles.

Pickling gear: Because that shit BURNS.



Day one:



Day 2(32 Hours later)

ASAP.org Syringomyelia confrence: SEND $

Want for my birthday

http://cgi.ebay.com/Casio-Cuff-Watch-Retro-Genuine-Leather-/230459442915?cmd=ViewItem&pt=Wristwatches&hash=item35a87406e3

Both my timex watches have
shit the bed, so to speak. I have had casio watches that lasted so long that they literally still were working even when the pain was chipping off them and the band was falling apart.

I am a little old to wear a Baby-g-shock (though I do still love them!!!) But this watch by casio is SICK and I want it for my birthday.

I know Chris owes me still from last year...and my parents skimped me.

Maybe they can join together and buy me a watch!

kJ

Food Porn

Even though its getting nicer out this transition weather has been cold and sometimes rainy.

Which leads me to whip up some leftover magic and reintroduce my oven to bake wear.

Pistachio Crusted Vanilla Cream Cupcakes:



Maple Glazed Ham, Cheddar cheese, Fried egg on a home made buttermilk biscuit sandwich:



Tonight I am letting my fingers do the cooking via cell phone.

Delivery pizza for Crash and a nap with a heating pad for me.

KJ

Opening my beercard

So I decided I am going to open my beer card. But only to review ONE beer a weekend.

But I am going to put the list up here so I can cross them off as I drink them.

Start with some locals and some easy finds that got high ratings.

Middle Ages Brewery Dragon Slayer

Middle Ages Brewery Wailing Wench

Laguinitas Brewing Company Brown Shugga'

Sam Adams Cranberry Lambic

Ithaca Beer Company Cascazilla

Dogfish Head Craft Brewery Midas Touch Golden Elixir

Brewery Ommegang Ommegang Nine Spice Harvest Ale

Stone Brewing Company Stone ruination IPA

Harpoon Brewery Harpoon Leviathan Imperial Red Ale

http://www.lawsonsfinest.com and I want to go here and try the Nano beer Maple Triple. It won bronze against beers from around the WORLD.

Big porch plans and food thoughts

So I really want a hammock for the back yard or the front porch.

I saw these: Hammocks

And I think the price and everything would be suitable.

I just want our house to be relaxing.

I worked hard last summer to make a garden, plant flowers, create a porch garden. A place for Chris and I to come and enjoy the weather.

I am planning on getting a straw bale and making it into a waist high herb garden. I had tried before in old underbed storage containers. My friend has his back yard all in straw bale and its no weeds, waist high and easy and cheap to set up.

I just will use the free mulch from the dPW, some fertilizer, and water that I mix crumbled nori into.(cheaper than buying the liquid from the manufacturer and works as well) Besides we eat Nori all the time in this house when we make sashimi or Nori brittle.

It comes in a little shaker and we frequently use it when we make tofu salad with eggs (to lower the cholesterol) we feed the cooked yolk to the dog, only use 2 eggs and 1/2 brick firm tofu with light miracle whip, onions, celery, pink and black pepper and Kelp sprinkles. Sometimes I make the eggs and tofu into a mousse and then add the veggies and we eat it like pate on crackers, or other times just on farm bread.

Either way its good.

We were fortunate to have ham for easter. They also make Lamb. But Lamb, Goat, and chicken I find take a deft hand to cook well. So the last time they cooked a turkey I actually went over early and brought over one of my vintage cookbooks that i collect that had a old tried and true recipe for Rosemary Citris Turkey Cruet.

Now I though they being gay would have a submergeable cruet which is like a clay cooking oven that you soak in water s when you are cooking a bird or dry piece of meat, the water keeps it moist.

They did not.

They DID have a large french casserole big enough for the turkey which I was amazed, and oven bags.

So I brought one of the guys to the store and picked up sweet onions, sausage, rosemary, day old french bread and farmers wheat, Basil, LAVENDER SEA SALT, which I reccomend everyne tries to make or buy once in their life. Finally a case of Sweet Valencia oranges, and some raw agave nectar.

I went with him home where the other partner was cleaning the bird. I cut the oranges (there were 13) all into 1/2's and the onions into 1/8s 2/3 of the oranges were tossed in a bowl with 1/4 agave, 4 springs rosemary and a handful of onions. Then this was places in the cavaty.

Outside the bird was rubbed with agave, sprinkled with olive oil, then the remaining oragnes and rosemary and onions went beside the bird nestled in.

Finally cracked Lavender salt and Tri color pepper was dusted over it and the bag was shut and the lid put on.

hours later.

Fragrant, perfectly cooked, falling off the bone, moist, flavorful turkey.

Seriously not a difficult recipe and I have used it for making chicken but I don't eat fowl very often unless I shoot it or help process it myself.

When I am going to be eating something that I feel some sadness that id died, or that I know its meat costs a lot of money, I want to make sure that the preparation doesn't outdo the taste of the meat.

My cousin taught me the best way to eat a steak is cowboy style, thick cut, over a grill, rare as you dare with a bit of sea sat and cracked black pepper.

THe only thing I can tell him now after having m mind blown by vegetables all over the world? try that steak with Sesame soy marinated cucumbers. The coolness of the cucumbers with the bits of the soy and vinegar mixed with the sweetness of the sugar in the sauce actually adds so much to grilled meats.

I am putting it below and I hope to all my friends and family who read this you become curious and exploratory with your palette.

SESAME CUCUMBERS

2 cucumbers chopped and seeded
2 tbsp. sesame seeds
1 tsp. sugar
3 tbsp. vinegar
1 tsp. soy sauce

Skin, de-seed and chop cucumbers, cover with salt. Let stand 30 minutes. Press and drain excess liquid. Coat frying pan with a thin sheen of oil. Sprinkle one layer of sesame seeds into pan. Cook over medium flame until brown. Place seeds in a Mortar and pestle or a clean coffee Grinder. Grind until fluffy. Add sugar, vinegar and soy sauce, and mix together until thoroughly encorperated.

Pour over cucumbers. Chill 1 hour before serving.

This is great with Red meat, fish,BBQ chicken, almost anything off the grill.

Go try something new tonight.

Henry ROllins, did not marry me. Sad day.

But guess who got to hug Henry Rollins, get his autograph, get a picture of him outside his tour bus, talk to him about South Africa (My dad was born there and I have been once, Henry is going back in 2 weeks) and tell him places he should visit when he gets to Nicaragua, cause he has never gone! (again once because having wealthy summer room mates from other countries and a passport was awesome!)

Yeah, be jealous...I am :cool:

For my suffering I was gifted with whiskey bombs by my bouncer friend Dix and his girl "H" (3 Amber Beers) and then handed a beer by KT, Dennis, and Keir (3 Guiness Draughts) and then bought ANOTHER beer upon being discovered by Bax walking out of a bar where he had ditched his date (1 Red Stripe in a can).

A grand total of 7 alcoholic drinks in 5 hours.:alcoholic:

I came home belching and complaining about the ceiling spinning. Crash made me make myself eggs and toast, drunk. Which is a good thing I am such a autopilot cook because I seriously was looking down periodically watching my hands move and grab things and thinking "wow, that looks good, whose making that?" Yeah...drunk.

7:30AM the next morning my cell rang and it was Bax texting me saying "How hungover are you?"

I sent him a pic of me in my hoodie, with my skullcap, and sunglasses on flipping the bird to the camera.

Today I can only say I prayed to the great deity of pharmaceuticals. If it were not for Zofran, Tramadol, and Nutritional shakes I would still be lying in bed with the dog complaining that Crash was breathing too loud. :disgust:

As of now I am happily doped, managed to go to dinner with my boy Darrin and actually eat a sandwich and later a slice of pizza (followed almost immediately by more Zofran)

Tomorrow is Bax birfday and I have to go figure out what to get the old man. He called to check on me and asked if I was coming out with him to celebrate. :( I told him I loved him to death but on top of the hangover in the seventh ring, Crash and I are still fighting off the plague. He said "You could come and not drink! Honestly I think he was just trying to be nice, Crash really doesn't want to go out, I've been out twice this week already and I know his boy AJ AM is going to be there and that guy is still sweating me about "How do I know you?!" I don't know how many times I shoudl have to tell a smokehead "I hit and quit you, now I am off market property, move on, write it down" I know AJ AM is friends with Bax and hell he was friends with me but its been 10 years since spent time with AJ. SO....get over it ad move on?

Maybe I am rude but everytime we all get together he brings it up and Bax and I are both like "OK new subject anything else, what do you do for living, favorite band, NAME your kids AJ!!! usually that one shuts him up or confuses him so he is deterred or refocused enough so I can slip away ad talk to some of our other friends like will or Bri that I know who also give AJ the head shake.

Long story short. Hanging out with Bax guy friends in a group is like all the girl drama and emotions with none of the holding back or restraint. Because on top of Aj you have Bri who has a control freak GF who calls him every 5 mintues when she hangs with us. We go shoot pool, see a movie, play chess, and his phone is ringing every 5 minutes with her yelling at him LONG DISTANCE, to get back to his mama's house and be home in case she wants to talk.

Because she doesn't trust ME. A person who is engages, who she has never met, who doesn' find your BF Bri attractive in any semblance of the imagination. Yet even if I did I love MY fiance and I am not a stupid home wrecking nutbag.

But my ex military, firfighting, gun liking, marttial arts, motorcycle riding, and movie and traveling interests amke it so I get along with all Bax friends and I am the only girl they invite because I am pretty much the kid sister.

So half the guys who are married have their wives calling them every 10 minutes, or just randomly stopping by. To see if I have managed to erase their mind and steal their essence and make them run away with me...I don't know because I don't get women whic is why I hang out with a bunch of guys...But Bax crew...Its the guys ans the girls who have some drama and its exhausting. and tedious. Bax keeps saying they have to know you are like our kid sister and if these people don't like you, there's something up, because you are my barometer. You are like a puppy.

Gee thanks.

It just isn't relaxing it inds up bing socially taxing and not party but a artistic event of dodging and weaving around people and leaving early enough to avoid most of them but lte enough not to appear weak or tick off Bax. See? Guy drama? Girl Drama? It sucks the life from you like a lesion! I just thought I'd figure out a time to gift him later.

In typical Bax form he said "I hope it will keep!" to which Darrin who heard the convo said "No problem we poked air holes, now we are just waiting for her papers. :rolleyes: One more joke from either of them about a mail order bride...Its just gone from "oh hah stupid joke to "OK seriously, you are dumb and I don't want a INS agent tailing me because you guys have a stupid sense of humor."

With my recent luck, it would happen.

Tomorrow I should get my shoes:

I spent a LOT of money but my friends all tell me they last a long time (longer than New Balance) and are the best shoes for a bad back and bad feet.

Then I just have to figure out what to buy Bax for his birfay... I am thinking new bamboo plugs (have) some catnip for his babies (Godzilla and Dracula) he and both like knives, guns, motocycles, sushi, tea, comic books...asian stuff...

I mean I know he has a tea pot so I can't get him that. He already has a machete. I am not giving him any of MY guns, they have sentimental attachments and I like to target shoot. I am thinking I will try to find some B movie dracula bat related something. He likes bats and dracula and vampires. Because he is weird.

I am totally stumped so PLEASE feel free to text me with ideas if you have my number. or tell me via facebook.

KJ

Cross Post: Rules and regulations

Rules and regulations
Posted Today at 08:12 PM by Keenkitty
I am not stupid enough to go shooting off my mouth to purposely offend people just to get myself tossed out on my behind.

In fact those of you who know me really well, know that when I get angry I don't get foul mouthed and irrational.

I get thoughtful and articulate.

The points that really rankled me was not that I got mod-slapped. Honestly with all the friends on here that I have lost who never come back here (you all know who they are), with the sheer number of PM's and messages and e-mails telling me that they too were mod-slapped for similar "offenses" I was feeling 50/50 on my comfort level talking about my life here.

However with the recent adoption of my brother and his partners new daughter. and the upcoming wedding of my Godmother, I was feeling really good about "LGBT" culture.

I was feeling like the idea that my godmother used to be a genetic man and now is going to get married to a wonderful man as a beautiful bride meant more people were OK with talking openly and honestly about what really goes on in our lives and how we really see ourselves.

We talk about tattoos in naughty places. We have entire blogs and threads devoted to piercing our bits. But that is OK because that type of information titillates but doesn't push too far past the comfort zone.

Yet if I say that I had over 240 partners before deciding to marry Crash and 100 of them were female I wonder how long it is going to take before I am told that is "inappropriate language or content"?

I do NOT talk about our bedroom life on here. I have never talked about the frequency or the lack there of on this blog. But I talk about my home boys joking around with me because they themselves are comfortable enough in their masculinity to hang around with our friends who are gay, straight, bi, purple with yellow polka dots, or disabled like me.

They treat each person on their individual merits or demerits as a case by case scenario. The fact that I wear boxers, appreciate women, have a sordid track record, and wear men's clothing and identify more with my homosexual brother than my bisexual sister doesn't matter to them.

They love KJ the music lover. They love the writer who wrote such a scathing review of a friends new restaurant that he still won't let us in there.

They love me because I treat everyone the way I would want t be treated and I am still hurt and angry that people are told to "Just pipe down and do what they tell you" or to not cause a fuss when something is really fundamentally screwed up.

It feels like they are saying: Be who you are, just, be fun LGBT, not out LGBT and not too much LGBT.

Better yet, just leave off the "T" because it makes us really uncomfortable.

The thing is. I used to be one of those people. I used to be uncomfortable and against the "T" in LGBT. So I can understand where they are coming from. But I never went as far as to ban someone else from talking about their life.

Life is a library, you don't like one book you walk away and get another book. You don't walk it up to the librarian and demand it be burned because someone else might read it.

You know I wouldn't talk to my godmother for three years when she started transitioning. Then I went to a conference and heard a Kate Bornstein lecture. I offered to take her out for lunch and ended up sitting in her car after wards crying in her arms.

She told me imagine if you were forced to wear dresses all the time, and hose, and put your hair up, or worse, shave it off, cover it, and never allowed show your face.

I told her I would feel like someone else was wearing my skin.

That night I went to my Godmothers house with cookies, Pricilla Queen of the Desert, and a 4 pack of Guinness. I let her paint my toenails, we sat up talking, laughing, and crying.

The next day after my shower I grabbed my boxers and pulled them on and saw her in her makeup and robe.

I was shocked because she was beautiful. SHE was beautiful. I'd never thought of my godfather as a great looking person. But My godmother was poised, elegant, smiling, and beautiful.

I changed my mind about being weird-ed out or against the "T" in LGBT after that.

So I guess yeah this is a community for us to talk about long hair. But we talk about other things. We seem to pick and choose what we get offended about and what we choose to find appropriate and inappropriate.

However, if I were to use that same logic in my life 12 years ago I would have wrote off my Godmother and never been involved with the LGBT community and have the many friends that I have. Many of which have come on here and later left because they didn't feel welcome.

Merriam-Webster defines "Community" as:

"Main Entry: com·mu·ni·ty
Pronunciation: \kə-ˈmyü-nə-tē\

1 : a unified body of individuals, people with common interests, an interacting population of various kinds of individuals (as species) in a common location d : a group of people with a common characteristic or interest living together within a larger society: social activity : fellowship d : a social state or condition."

We are a LONG HAIR community. Not a Long Hair >insert neutral non offensive term< Community.

It would be really unfortunate if we started to pick and choose what types, and whom those "various kinds of individuals" can be.

KJ

Freedom of speech is Bullshit.

"FUK! and I am so gay."

Deleted Blog Entry: Because of offensive language.

Posted March 19th, 2010 at 12:24 AM by Keenkitty:

I vampire d again.

slept all damn day.

FUK FUK FUK!

I have been watching "The L word" and trying to alk to my brother Jase about it and he is not into it. He is bitching about me not watching Project Runway the INSTANT it comes on so that we can talk about it all week long.

So I picked up a fashion magazine today because Lady Gaga was on the cover and we went through the outfits together and I was saying I liked the outfits the guys were wearing.

Suddenly my brother squeals "You are so GAY!"

uh yeah, I am, I REALLY am, and?

I know I am like a "Bi-butch/Gay-guy" as my fiance calls it. Except that I like to shave my armpits and legs, I wear makeup sometimes, and I have longer hair.

Other than that my fiance and I wear the same style clothes. My friend Bax and I wear each others clothes. (And the bastard stole my opalite plugs saying "you don't wear these, they too small fo' yo' azz, I wan'em" ) and I have exactly three girls shirts. and 4 girls pants. The rest are guys.

If I tweezed my brows, wore product in my hair, and watched what I ate and worked out more, I would be a gay man.

Well I would need a peenus but honestly I would probably stick it into too many things I wasn't supposed too so its a good thing I don't have one.

Bax said today on our hike "Man I'm glad your not a guy, you'd be gay and you'd be sticking your sh*t into anything tight and dark as it is you probably carry your peenus around in your back pack."

I laughed so hard I literally almost fell off the edge of a fukkin cliff.

Bax caught my arm and Trib who was with us said "Dude, Shotokon over there saved your life, now he has to watch you like a hawk until it needs saving again"

Bax said "Thats it, you're going over the cliff"

It was an interesting afternoon.

When I got home I took out Chupdogra and he scared the sh*t out of the neighbor kid by barking at him. I scolded him and he didn't get to come to the bank with me. I drove Trib home and saw his new digs. He has n furniture, 3 cats, and sleeps on the floor.

Bax and I were like "Dude, this weekend you are taking the futon and we are getting you furniture."

His wife broke it off and cheated on him and HE LEFT her the house?! The guy is vegan and has LOST weight. I actually was able to lift him up today. I told him "OK, time for Mama to feed you, this weekend you are coming over and I am making you pasta."

Bax said he works all the time, never goes out, and sits at home with the cats and reads.

Bax was like "dude! wrong puddy!" We are going to make him go to a movie and not wear pajamas this time.

Crash was like "How many friends, like five? guy friends without girlfriends we have now? WTH man?"

He gets to stay home and babysit, I have to drag their sorry azzes out and make them do ****e.

Deceptacon: More than meets the eye

Deceptively simple, this hat was actually long in knitting. Knit on teeny needles it is a vegan yarn so its hand washable! This yarn has good stretch, little sheen and is warm and toasty.

great hat for a boyfriend or urban guy.

$30.00 will bring it home.







KJ

Double knit brim

The Wilford

starting bid: 20.00

E-mail if interested









Thanks

One more hat up for Auction

The Pixie

starting bid 20.00

E-mail if interested.





Thanks!

First Hat up for auction!

So I am auctioning this hat. I am jobless and physically crapped out. But I can knit, and apparently really well so here is a hat: Its made out of Moochi Plus by Crystal Palace. It is 80% Merino wool and 20% nylon so you can wash gently and flat dry.

Shipping to anywhere inside the Continental US (sorry Hawaii,Alaska, and Puerto Rico)

would be free, anywhere else I can calculate once it is figured out.

So here is the hat.

Bids start a $20.00

New hats will be up Shortly!




Thank you!

KJ

Life in review

So I have been watching a lot of Andrew Zimmerman, Man vs. Food,and Anthony Bourdain in my recovery since contracting a wicked kidney infection, then piggy-packing a sinus infection and costo-condritis on top of that.

It made me want to start my product reviews even more. There are so many products that we use or are given and asked to review that we I love or hate and I review them on Associated Content, but I always mean to make the reviews available here if they are not picked up exclusively.

I have picked up product and band reviews even some event and organization and company reviews. I would love to get some restaurant reviews. Having been raised my a chef dad and a Nana whose recipes were featured in over 20 church cookbooks and who made 12 different types of holiday cookies for over 14 sets of families not including her own every year until she was 83. I used to get cooking implements and pots and pans for holidays and birthdays because I asked for them.

Whenever I go home to Minnesota my Nana and I sneak her out of her retirement home and I find out which restaurant is supposedly the best in town that year and we get a reservation (I still don't know how, you mention her name and suddenly there is a table) and we go and eat and I always know if it is good not by how it tastes but by whether or not she asks if the chef would step out and say hello so she can give her compliments.

Once we were eating at a new restaurant in town and she had a reuben that was greasy and terrible. She told me to taste it and I could they had not used fresh sliced meat (from that day) they had left it on the grill to long, and had applied oil to the grill before putting the meat down to warm.

All rookie mistakes. But simple to see if you looked at the presentation of the sandwich. Also, if a customer complains, especially an 80 year old customer, you comp the meal and apologize.

Well this manager came out and said there was nothing wrong with the sandwich, maybe my Nana had no idea how Reubens were made and it wasn't his problem if she couldn't take a little grease.

I happened to know the owner of the restaurant was in the kitchen so I leaned over to my Nana and told her to follow me.

I walked quickly past the manager with my Nana on my heels with her walker. Walked up to the owner who knew my Nana. He said hello and I told him what his manager had said and dropped the greasy sandwich plate on his prep area.

He looked down at the soggy bread and sighed. He said our meal was free and he insisted we come back for dinner on him that weekend and bring the whole family.

The manager started mouthing off again and I slapped my hand on the counter and said "OK thats enough, I am going to SHOW you what a real Reuben looks like, get me a jacket and gloves."

The manager started saying something about insurance and impossible and the owner just laughed and told him my father had worked there as a sous chef when I was a little girl and to stop talking and watch.

I got my gear together tot bread toasting got kraut draining, started warming meat on a dry skillet on the grill as soon as it was steaming I flipped it a few times used tongs to put it on the toasted bread, added cheese, covered it for a few seconds with a lis, grabbed a plate, turned grabbed the kraut, gave a final shake, turned out the toasted sandwich, tonged out the kraut on the sandwich used a spatula to put it together, cut it in half on a cutting board, and plated it and then wiped the plate with a clean cloth.

The owner and my Nana each took a bit of the Reuben and said it was good, moist, not greasy. I asked the cook and the Manager to bite and they did. The manager just shook his head and walked out. The cook apologized.

I explained to the cook that My dad once worked at a Kosher deli and they used to make Reubens and Brisket, and all sorts of meat sandwiches in which you had to re heat meat. The trick was you had to make sure that if it was a oily meat like certain parts of Beef or perk, you didn't need to add oil when heating it up for a sandwich. Especially when serving it with something as moist as kraut.

It is were Chicken you might have to add some oil but you would have to slow the cooking process to make sure the meat didn't dry out and get chewy like breast tends to.

My Nana said it was too bad I already had a job in NY. I shook my head, I would never do food service again, talk about a harsh mistress!

We did end up coming back and having a great meal. They did hire a friend of my dads who was looking for less hours due to retirement and specialized in BBQ so he knew his meat. The steaks they served were excellent. They have since re-opened under a new name and re-located downtown and I have not had a chance to visit their new digs. Same chef, same owner. New menu with simpler options prepared based on seasnal availability.

My Nana said she heard it was great and she wants to go eat there. I just hope I don't end up in the kitchen.

Dear Food Bloggers, Hear my small rant

If you are going to go to a restaurant or a cafe or diner and review food there are a few ground rules those of us firmly ensconced in the culinary world ask of you.

1. If you are going to rant or rave about something; know what it is and what the ingredients are. Nothing is more annoying when a self proclaimed "foodie" says they enjoyed or hated something and can't describe what about the item or preparation they didn't like. Which brings us to number two.

2. Learn to cook. You don't have to cook well. You don't have to be a master chef, baker or BBQ boss. However you should be able to know how sauces are thickened, what common spices are used for what, and the names of some universally used meats, vegetables, fruits, grains, and how to prepare them in theory at least.

3. Be willing to try it. I have myself sampled so much wine, that I am now allergic to it and can't even eat dried fruit, drink grape juice,or anything with sulfites. I am also allergic to shellfish. But the way I found out how much I was allergic to shellfish was when I tried fresh caught oysters on the half shell with a squeeze of fresh lemon and a shot of hot sauce. My sister had to inject me with my epipen and I had to take a weeks worth of prednisone. Was it worth it to be able to say I have tried fresh Oysters? Hell yes. Unless its the local drinking water in a third world country be willing to take palate risks. This is how I found out I absolutely LOVE fried caterpillars and sun dried crickets in lime and salt.

4. When speaking about experiences with food keep perspectives clear. When you dine alone it is easier to describe food. Do not try to describe your dining partners experience! Not only is this impossible to do, but it is boring to read about. If you must let your diner relay his or her experience make a clear distinction; "Sally ordered the Corn Fritters. She ate half her order leaving the rest saying it was too rich but good. She described the fritters as crispy without being over fried with a soft bread like inside that was not the least bit goey...I sampled them as well and found the spices to a great compliment to the crunch of the corn meal crust. I could taste the black pepper, and a hint of oregano in the seasoning"

To sum it all up Foodie reviewers at large. If you are going to review food you need to do more than shove it down your gullet and describe what it tastes like and how it makes you feel. My father is a chef and my Nana a master baker and cook in her own right. I grew up around food and have spent years refining and spoiling my palate, and learning from both of them as well as some top chefs in the world who came to learn from my dad or came to visit the animal rescue I run with my partner. I love seeking out restaurants "known" for their award winning or famous entrees or desserts and taking friends with me. I've put in my time and have my chops and can call myself a foodie and not feel I have not earned the title.

Ask yourself Foodie blogger, if you are bragging about the restaurant PR invites you scored because you give good reviews even if its sub par food, are you doing well? Have you juggled four pans over a stove, cooked for 12 people, had 6 people all tell you they hated your food, or have 20 people clear you out of your appetizers? Have you written a review about someones restaurant that was so bad you were worried that they might send you a bill for the PR invite?
Unless you can say yes, in this foodies opinion you have not gotten your training wheels off yet and have more work to do.

I will fix you

My brother died this month, many years back. Cancer wracked his body and he died.

Its so strange that around this month and this time I start thinking not about my anniversary that is coming up in February, but of the family that I have lost.

An 18 year old brother in the Spring, an Uncle in the late summer, another brother in the winter, a best friend in the fall.

To name a few.

It seems every time that I say that I am becoming more comfortable with death, it tests me another time.

This year one of my good friends killed himself and I hadn't even seen him for months. I'd been sick and even hospitalized because of costochondritis. I'd seen him perhaps once in the three months of being sick and we'd promised we'd go out for lunch.

I had thought we had time to make up for me not being able to see him.

When he killed himself I thought; "I should be ok, this hah happened to me before with my brother, with my friends, this has happened three times, I should be ok with this."

It has been 6 months and I am still not ok with it.

I still feel like I should have known he was depressed.

I still feel like sick or not I should have forced myself from the hospital to the funeral.

I still wish I had the courage to call his family and ask where he was buried.

But I am ashamed because I don't want to say goodbye.

Not just to my friend. I am angry with all the people who left me and made it so I had to learn to be OK with death.

I still feel like I should feel guilty for feeling like that.

That is just how I feel. When something happens during the day and you think "Oh this person would love this!" and then you remember they are dead and that pain stabs you?

I hate that, and I still feel that about each person who I loved who has died.

So what have I learned that can help you? How can I go on? Well I can tell you it never goes away. That stabbing feeling. That bittersweet memory of you and that person and wishing you could just know that they knew that you still loved them and you missed them and thought about them.

What I can tell you is that stabbing feeling lets you know that you ARE still alive. And being alive is good. I can let you know that the people who are dead do know that you love them and that they are warm and safe and secure and far better off than we are.
I an tell you that even though having someone you love die is never easy, it doesn't change and the pain always gets better.

So maybe from all this death there was something I learned. Death University of sorts. I won't ever be jaded or untouched by the loss of life no matter how stone faced I may appear.

But maybe with all the things I have overcome, and all the things I have learned about death and grief, if you are saddened by loss and feeling alone, you can stand by me.

Maybe I can fix you.



KJ

Tub time

Because I have a bad back I take probably about 3-4 baths a week. This has led me to become somewhat of a bath connoisseur. I know where to get the best bubble bars, the best bath soaks, who makes the best salts and what temp makes the best bath.

I have become an expert on which herbs steep to make the softest skin, I have a collection of essential oils to mix and add to my bath to create stress reduction, cold remedy, relaxation, romantic, energizing and other scents.

I have the bath pillow which I sanitize and clean every three days. I have the back scrubber, I have the tub tray that allows me to read in the bath.

Seem a little extreme?

Here is the point of my bath. Not only is it a chance to relieve my back pain for 15 minutes and release some of the tight muscles that plague my body 24/7. It is a chance to inhale some aromatherapy, soften my skin, ex foliate, shave, steam the pores, and read a little without a cat on my chest (well, sometimes he still tries) or a dog bothering me.

Bath time is a time that I make very special for myself and make sure that it is undesturbed.

Everyone could take a little ritual like tub time and make it there own. Mayb tea time, or Meal time.

Hell maybe we should have several little things that we do for ourselves that are little but special.

It helps us feel cared for and relaxed.

Think of how much money we would save if we did little things like taking a nice bath and time for tea each day instead of spending hundreds of dollars every 6 months to "get away" to an expensive spa.

Think about it.

KJ

Muses from the Manlove-Armstrong Clan

Funnies between us often amuse the hell out of us but there is no one else to hear it but the dog.

So Crash composed what he thought was the 5 best anecdotes of the year:

1. Me: "You had me wrap my own present, and your present didn't come here on time, and we have to go eat terrible food at a house with your father's in laws who are horrible people, christmas sucks."
Chris to the dog: "Don't listen to mommy, she also killed santa and ate the easter bunny."

2. Chris: "What time did you set Hello Kitty for?"

Me: "I set it for, time for Chris to get a pair of glasses, and go to bed earlier so he didn't need two alarm clocks."

Chris: "Is that around 6:15?"

3. 3AM I am awake and saying "Fear is the mind killer, fear is the little death, I will not fear."

Chris: "Fear is waking up at 3AM to your fiance talking to herself...go to sleep!"

4. Chris from the bathroom. "Hunny?!"

Me: "Yes?"

Chris: "Um, Can you come in here and get Billy? I need some privacy."

Me, walking into the bathroom. "Sure, why?"

I walk in and see Billy standing on the sink staring eye to eye with Chris seated on the bathtub.

Chris: "I think h wants to intimidate me and I need to, um, take care of some things and I don't think I can do it while he stares at me."

Me: "Why? We look at them when they go?"

Chris looks shocked: "I would never watch them go potty, that is private you are depraved.

Both men look at me blinking and staring. I roll my eyes and leave picking up Billy.

5. While shoveling outside Chris had me bring the dog out. It was 4AM when we had to go outside and clear snow off, and shovel out the drive. After clearing the snow and drive and sidewalk and came back inside and crawled back into bed where I cuddled up to my large black cat and told him "Billy you are lucky you are a kitty, you didn't have to be Cold, and outside helping Daddy shovel snow." Chris heard me mutter this before I passed out to sleep and laughed about it all week.

Now he teases me each morning that its time for Kane and I to get up and go outside to be "cold and outside helping"

We are not amused.

Happy Holidaze from the Manlove Armstrong Krew

KJ, Crash, Kane, Billy, Ani, and Jayne

In fondest memory Of Samsara Rose 2005-2009

Million dollar ideas...

In times of great stress we seem to find out thing about ourselves and others.

Things we didn't want to know.

In great sickness we find out who are friends are. here are friends who send e-mails. Then there are friends who follow around with a shop-vac.

In our worst hours there are friends who hold a mirror up to us and make us see our deep dark truth. In we either repay that kindness by facing that darkness and wrangling that dark passenger. Or we smash that mirror and turn our back on the friend who had the courage to call us on our bullshit.

In great sadness we find the person who knows that place you go to hide when you say you want to be alone, but you really shouldn't.

And again you will find the person you call with trembling hands, and weakest resolve who tells you quite honestly they just don't have the time for you right now.

It is both eye opening and heart wrenching the things that we find out when life decides to make things interesting for us.

There must be millions of dollars of research and man hours spent trying to find that one curative fix that would replace the healing effect of simple human kindness.

Thinking about the worst times in life, heart wrenched, broken, mind numb, body aching, mind all jumbled yet unable to focus on anything.

The urgency to be alone, yet the craving to be consoled.

The need to have someone say something to make everything make sense, and the wish that everyone would just stop talking.

Imagine if there was a pill, or a drink, or a patch. In your worst moment you pop it, slap it on, drop it under your tongue and suddenly your entire being is filled with the sense that everything really does happen for a reason and things really will work out and you are ok, and everything will be ok.

Suddenly you are calm, you can handle everything and you feel comforted and safe and assured that everything will be taken care of.

Someone would be a millionaire.

Part of me wonders if that is what alcoholics and drug addicts are seeking. However after questioning them as to how they feel when they do drugs they say it just makes them forget about how hard life is for a while.

But thats just it, what a poor drug or alcoholic I would be. I want something more. I already have a hard time remembering things and I need to remember things so that I know if they are working out.

I've tried a lot of things to reach this state of calm. Hypnotism,Meditation, Yoga, running, Martial Arts, Tai Chi, Fasting, even a sweat lodge ceremony.

Several times I have seen things I cannot explain. Several times I have felt closer to the earth and nature and closer in tune with my body.

Never have I felt that calm assurance that everything was going to be OK.

The reason I seek it out so diligently is that I am told that I appear to have it.

I am not a stranger to death. I saw my first animal corpse while hiking through the woods near my house. We came into a clearing and found a cat that had been nailed to a stump and gutted.

I had enough sense not to touch anything sent my friend back to call the police and stayed put.

I was the one who listened as the officers asked if anyone recognized the cat, saw any collars, or knew of anyone who hung out here a lot. I calmly told them about the neighbor who had three cats whose yard was adjacent, the kids who came down here to smoke who I'd seen the other night hanging out in the cemetery, and retraced our steps and showed them cigarette butts and shoe treads.

I felt angry about the cat because it was innocent. My friend threw up in the bushes and never spoke to me much after that.

A few years later my brother killed himself in our basement and I was the one who found him. I was 14. I remember waking up to my grandmother yelling hysterically.

I was screaming for 10 seconds. Then Nana slapped me and told me she needed me to be strong because she couldn't go into his room again. Something slid into place and I just handled it. I called 911,checked his pulse. I took the shotgun out of his dead hands, I unloaded it, I put on the safety and put it on the floor. I led the police down the stairs and showed them the body. I remember feeling calm. Like everything was OK. Like he was there behind me walking me through each step.

I remember washing linens for the company and making sure we had pillows. I remember my Nana telling me thank you because she just couldn't have gone into that room again.

We never talked about it after that.

I have seen hundreds of dead bodies and seen thousands of medical emergencies and life threatening situations and I still snap into that calm. I just do what needs to be done.

Its the afterwards part that is becoming a problem and I wonder if it is something that more people suffer from than just myself.

We learn to self soothe from example. In times of great trauma in my family they threw their hands up in the air and argued until I handled the situation. As early as 9 years old I was soothing over arguments, helping a drunk mother drive a car, and calling the police on a fight between my brother and my drunken parent. While consoling my bereft grandmother.

I don't remember what happened after I fixed things. I just remember that after things got out of hand, I would fix things even in college if my Nana and my mother were fighting I would come home and soothe things over. Because I could remain calm and not rise to anyones bait.

Even now people throw tantrums and things get insane and people get hurt and I am detached and making a list of how to best smooth things over.

But after its over and everyone else feels better. I don't know what to do.

How does one self soothe if they were never taught how? How do you learn to let yourself when everyone around you is telling you to take care of them?

The immediately pragmatic list making, name taking and sensible side says get over it. You may never learn to self soothe, you may forever bite your nails, have ulcers, and insomnia but you will always be calm under pressure. Count your blessings.

Yet the other side of me thinks after a half life of taking care of everyone else, I can still learn new tricks. Yes, I can be absolutely rock solid and calm under pressure. Learning to self soothe doesn't mean I am going to weep if someone has a heart attack in front of me instead of starting CPR. It may just mean that later I may give myself permission to be a little shaken up. To need extra hugs from my fiance, or a call from a friend.

Perhaps I will never invent the magic pill, and I won't learn to "get over" the strong after currents that come with emotions. But maybe by taking some time to learn some positive self soothing I can be even better without one.

Yet we still try to work against the whales

http://www2.wdcs.org/blog/index.php?/archives/258-Orcas-and-fishermen-working-together.html

Tietze's syndrome

Finally an answer as to why I keep getting chronic chest pain. My doctor says it is also called Costocondritis and with patients like me who have Fibromyalgia and Syringomyelia it can occur for any reason.

He thinks mine was brought on because of infections in my bladder and sinuses. (Coughing, sneezing, and peeing a lot I guess?!)

He said it can take between a week to 6 months for it to go away.

I am back on prednisone and antibiotics and on a schedule of pain medication. I was able to sleep for a while last night in bed and today upright in my chair with a down comforter wrapped around my ribs.

I only woke when the dog nosed me in the gut to go outside.

Crash (fiance) wants to tape pillows around my ribs so he doesn't hit me in the ribs by accident again and make me wake up in tears!

He also got me a new buckwheat pillow for my neck it smells like lavender and works great on my neck.

KJ

The only way I will watch Single Lady's by Beyonce

http://music.todaysbigthing.com/2009/08/24

Mother Amy

OK. So after Amy Winehouse's complete debauchery and addiction some moron said "I know! I am going to have her be my child's Godparent and let her sign then to her label and mentor her!"

YES! Because what a roll model for a easily influenced 13 year old girl!

F.F.S.

KJ

Man Screw Cancer

My dad has Stage Two Lung Cancer

His Oncologist says he has about 98% chance of success in radiation successfully getting most of if all of the cancer but because it went undetected and spread to his brain he had a high chance of relapse.

His stats are:
3 and 5 year life expectancy if they can't remove all the cancer from his lungs or it metastasizes to his lymph nodes.


Distant metastasizes as first failure were noted in 38 patients (39%) with brain metastasizes....
This is important because my dad had a brain tumor removed.

If he relapses there is a 45.2 and 37.3% chance they can eradicate the cancer again. This time with only a fifteen (15.3%) percent success rate.


In laymen;s terms this means They can't operate so they have been radiating him. If radiation doesn't work, he has between 6 months to a year dependent on how long he can stand radiation and chemotherapy. Because his original tumor was found in his brain there is a higher chance that despite taking out the brain tumors and using radiation therapy on his lungs, that he will relapse.

If he relapses and the cancer comes back, his prognosis is even shorter.

Seriously, Fu*k cancer.

KJ

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New Article coming up soon

http://www.associatedcontent.com/user/499923/kj_callaway.html